Day 85: Mile 959.8 - 975.8
At the end of today, when I got to camp, Quiet was already here with her tent setup, contemplating dinner. How was your hike, she asked. Terrible, I replied. And when Dylan came up a bit later, joining Quiet and now Uno and myself at camp, and asked the same, I gave the same response: terrible. And though both times I said it in a chipper voice with a hint of a smile, still it was a true sentiment.
Because I didn't have it today.
I didn't have it in the morning when we went over Benson Pass, a pass that isn't that high, isn't that steep, isn't that long--shouldn't be that hard. But it kicked my butt six ways to Sunday, so by the time I was at the top I was utterly exhausted. I remember talking to Uno on the way up, saying how tired I was. I feel old, I said, and she agreed. Aren't we supposed to be stronger hikers now, I asked, because I don't feel it. Her thought was that we were just worn out from all this time in the Sierras; I remember Dylan a couple days ago had mentioned that he also felt tired, and wondered if it wasn't the poor hiker diet finally starting to take its toll. Either way, today I was gassed, and it took so much just to ge to the top of Benson Pass, only 6 miles in.
And I still had 10 miles to go! We would stop for lunch about 2 miles past Benson Pass, at Smedberg Lake, and while I had intended to make it a quick turnaround--eat, dry out rain fly (we had camped by a lake last night, so this morning the rain fly was soaking wet with condensation), charge camera and inReach via solar panel--instead ended up being a 2 hour stint. And when I left, I was more tired than when I had arrived, and was honestly surprised I could even hike. I just wanted to lay down and sleep and sleep and sleep. But we had to go, and so I went. And today it seemed like there were no level portions of trail, everything was either up or down--either punishing pushes on the uphills, or technical precisions on the downhills (downhills are especially tough nowadays, since a downward footfall of more than 6 inches or so rattles my ribs a little, so there's a little bit of pain with each steep step)--it made for slow going. But somehow I managed to make it all the way to the top of Seavey Pass, where we camped, about 0.1 miles after the pass proper, here at another lake.
All in all, a day of 16 miles (putting me squarely in the 15+ club), with 2 passes, on a day when I started exhausted, is not bad: I'll take it. But I'm definitely very, very tired. Recovery-wise, the ribs are doing better: I'm still discovering new portions of lung as I breathe--today I discovered the back part of my lung, behind the shoulder blade--and mostly things are more sore-pain than sharp-pain. The right arm is doing a bit worse: this morning I moved it around to loosen it up, and even just holding my arm out straight from my side--making a sort of cross shape--I could feel my shoulder spasming and couldn't hold the position. My right arm had problems before the hike, now that I think about it--I always suspected a tiny labrum tear or something similar. It had bothered me the first couple weeks of the PCT, but then went away and I didn't think about it. Well, I'm back to thinking about it now. Hopefully it'll resolve in, say, two weeks again, but until then, I'll try to slowly work it by using my poles.
I'm not sure why I'm so tired today. Maybe it is indeed the Sierras taking their toll: I remember one random person remarking that they had seen the PCT hikers come through a couple years ago, and their faces were haggard and shell-shocked. But they were coming through a high snow year, whereas we'd had beautiful weather by comparison. So maybe it's due to the accident, the body pulling energy away from its usual dispensations and instead focusing its on ribs and arm. Less energy then for the normal business of hiking. Or maybe I'm just getting old, and the lack of restful sleep--even a single slightly worse night--upsets recovery enough that I feel it, and feel it bad, the next day. Either way, whether it be one of these or a combination of these or none of these, I feel tired, I feel bushed, I feel exhausted. Even at dinner tonight, didn't talk much: too tired. Didn't move much: too tired. And all the aches and pains--associated with leaning over, associated with reaching out to pick up something associated with bending and rising from the knee--all those little guys which had been going away are coming back, and they hurt.
So today was a terrible day, physically. Scenery-wise, there were some nice bits--we coninue to be in the wilderness, we continue to travel through narrow canyons with massive granite on both sides, hidden by the tall trees, we continue to bump into little streams and rivulets, hidden and burbling, as we go. But I didn't really pay much attention to them this time around. Maybe tomorrow. Because tomorrow will be better. Tomorrow is always better.
-- Miller Lake > Matterhorn Creek > Wilson Creek > Benson Pass > Smedberg Lake > Benson Lake Junction > Seavey Pass > Campsite
-- In order to sleep better at night, I've been taking a dose of Advil. I started with 4 tablets, then 3, then 2 last night and I didn't sleep well. So back up to 3 tonight! We'll see how it goes: I don't like taking medication if I don't have to, and if I have to I prefer to take the minimal dose. I'm not sure why this is, just seems to be the way I'm wired. After all, I also don't like to take caffeine unless I have to.
-- I did almost get lost, at one river crossing in the woods, where I followed a use trail up to a log crossing the water. Which I used. Then bushwacked a bit to another log crossing another branch of the water. Which I used. Then bushwacked a bit to a final log crossing a final branch of the water. This log was a bit iffy, though: whereas the other two were clearly above the water, this one's far end lay in the water, so as I got closer to the end, each footfall made it sink lower and lower into the stream. Did make it without getting my feet wet, though! So that was a bit of an adventure.
-- Oh, and of course Dylan was happy today: he got in another 3-swim day: at Miller Lake in the morning before setting out, at Smedberg Lake over lunch, and at one of the little unnamed lakes right before Seavey Pass (that was advertised in a couple comments as the best swimming spot on the PCT, but I don't think Dylan was impressed: too many big logs hidden under the murky water). So while I had a tough and terrible day on this section, other folks had glorious and good days!
-- At Smedberg Lake, towards the end of the two hours, I did feel a drop or two of rain: there were large puffy clouds gathering over the mountains south of the lake, although the winds seemed to make them run parallel to the ridgeline, rather than crossing over to us. As we continued to hike, the clouds above did appear to threaten rain, although seemingly always in the next ridge over, the next valley over, rather than directly overhead. And we did here the rumbling of thunder, but always from afar. So that was good: no rain!
-- Oh, and we bumped into Lux and Kahleesi again, at Smedberg Lake. I came up just as they had finished a swim and were starting lunch. Would eat with them, then they would head out ahead--me and the rest of the group would follow about an hour later. They're camped a little bit ahead of us: instead of stopping at this campsite just after the pass, they were planning on stopping at the next campsite a bit past the pass. They had wanted to do 20 mile days, but those are hard: listening to them talking over lunch, I think they may have gotten it yesterday, but were gassed: repeating it seemed unlikely. But I think that's fine: it comes down to what Michael Be mentioned so many weeks ago, back in Angeles National Forest when 20 mile days were still a novelty. I've done a 20-mile day, he said, and now I know that that's in my quiver, and I know I can pull it out when I need to. Not that I'm going to--it's exhausting--but it's good to know that I can.
-- Being by myself often today, and being slow--oh so slow!--I "rediscovered" photography. Mostly because it gave me an excuse to stop and catch my breath: oh, I'm just lining up this shot here, y'see. But also, especially in the evening, the storm clouds no longer storming but still lingering made for some pretty cloud shots. And that's what I "rediscovered": the two basic shots that taught me everything I know about composition, namely, flower shots and cloud shots. Back to, well, the beginning, actually. Now I have no idea how the photos turned out--won't know that until after the trail at this rate--but it was good at least thinking that I had the Eye back again!
-- At dinner, Outlast was telling the story of how in Bishop, AC/DC and himself had gotten a private room at The Hostel California, choosing it because the Guthooks comments said "good vibes"! And they rapidly realized what that meant: a very frat-house sort of feel, which is fine, but not them. And I will say that there is a certain party vibe on trail--especially in town--which I always avoid. Like when someone asks if you smoke, they don't mean cigarettes. Like spell out the initials of "The Hostel California". Those habits are pretty common on trail, and accepted; nonetheless, I'm pretty happy to find a group that doesn't indulge. As Outlast put it, hmm, good vibes?, not for us! Maybe we're into bad vibes instead?
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